Mr Danger’s feed back from school has been nothing short of positivity, really there is so much doom and gloom at times, that a cheeky little fellow who has undergone such radical surgery, has for what it seems, beat epilepsy and is thriving since his surgery!

I want my blog to be a place of spreading hope and awareness. I’m not a bullshitter though. I will tell you when it gets tough, like I’ve done in the past.

We have a new life (more of that later!) but I’m still very much on my anti-anxiety meds. I am trying to breathe more, and adapt to this new way of living. I’m still in shock of not having my dad around. He was a huge, and will always be, a huge important part of my life. I went to him for advice (how do you empty a pool?!), debates and just general chit chat. He was my buddy. I miss him and my heart hurts.

I don’t care if people roll their eyes, (their deal, not mine) I loved him and he made me proud. I drove him crazy and vice versa – you know, Papa Don’t Preach?!

I allow myself to grieve because if I don’t, it manifests into something much worse. Almost like living a double life.

It is hard for Danger and Jaz E to express themselves. Jaz thinks he’s at the old house, until I gently remind her he’s not. Mr Danger points at buses and says ‘Poppa’ (he remembers well that he was a bus driver in his later years).

I get sick of people implying ‘move on’. It’s a process and I’m going to take all the time I need.

And just like my kids, they need the time too.

Life is short enough and flies by so very quickly, moving on happens regardless because that is life. We make the choice each day to get up and move along.

So it brings me full circle to what this post is about.

The fact that I have had such lovely letters come from his school regarding his ability to concentrate more, be happily involved in the class, makes my heart just that bit more happy.

And having a happy heart is good for me.

*as I wrote this, a butterfly was dancing at the window 🙂

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